Nigeria has an interesting history; a British colony where the locals were traded into slavery for gin - Sounds a bit like Canada, but the natives in North America preferred whiskey. One other thing the British left was their language.
Now, by no means do Nigerian's speak "the Queen's English" (unless they were fortunate to study abroad - which many do.) After several weeks of being here, I can understand, for the most part, what someone is trying to say unless they break in to Yoruba. Yoruba is the local language around Lagos and is incredibly difficult to master due to the excessive use of tones. For instance the simple 4 letter word 'igba' can mean a period of time, two hundred, half a calabash or a locust tree!
There is also a ton of local slang which takes time to understand, but when used by an Expat, brings a big smile to the locals face. Here is a list of slang put together and published on another blog by a guy named Rhycnus.
Go-slow - Slow moving mass of traffic. Average speed 2kmph. Length can stretch from 100meterss due to an illegally parked danfoe to 10km due to basic traffic management issues
Hold-up - Slower version of go-slow.
Nigeria factor - Local rendition of Murphy's Law (anything can and will go wrong)
Attaall - Emphatic denial. Usually delivered with violent shakes of head, short for 'not at all'
Oga-Boss, 'Mastah'
Now now - As close as possible to the Nigerian concept of 'immediately'. Can be appended with any number of now's depending on urgency
Dash - Tip/Bribe. Usage - Dash me something
Anytinforaas - Request for a dash, by more than one person
Anytinfowmi - Request for a dash, by one person
Settul - To amicably conclude contentious issue, involves commercial transactions and negotiation
Ijebu maan - Native of Ijebu Ode, small town north of Lagos, rumoured to be inhabited by extremely stingy people
Do Weekend - Give a small tip so as to allow person to celebrate weekend. Celebration will happen from cumulative tips collected, hence to be restricted to 20-50 naira
Last last - Absolute lowest price one can go down to, used when you want to wrap up negotiations
Get bellay - Become pregnant
Done finish - Have finished. This is especially confusing to newbies as 'done' sounds remarkably like 'don't'
No go come - (He's) not coming
Danfoe - Yellow minibus plying on Lagos roads as public transport, associated with vicious driving and to whom normal traffic rules don't apply. You've arrived as a driver if you can stand your own against one
Okada - Motorcycle/moped taxi. Usually plies within localities. Can take upto two passengers. Scant respect of traffic rules makes them dangerous for other denizens of roads. Are the best guides to the nooks and crannies of Lagos
Oyibbo - Yoruba for 'white man'. Most locals do not distinguish between Caucasians, Mongoloids, Indians or Arabs. The word is not derogatory, but is used to hail you in crowded places or simply to acknowledge that you are coloured lighter than them
By the Grace of God - Any commitment that ends with these words is to be looked upon with suspicion. This is not a simple invocation. It is the speaker's way of saying, I do not think carrying out this commitment is in my hands. It might as well be left to divine intervention. The only consolation here is that if the work actually gets done (don't get your hopes up, this is extremely rare), the person will give thanks to the same God they invoked
Am/is on the way - Usually prefixed by a first or third person pronoun, this means that the person is approximately ten minutes away from setting out to meet you. Depending on any number of external factors (a detour to buy provisions, attending another meeting en route), the person should be with you in the next 2-3 hours.
Go-slow (alternative definition) - The most common Lagosian excuse for arriving late. This is a foolproof excuse in that it can never be disproved, unless if you were sitting with the person in the same vehicle. This is usually delivered with an exasperated shake of the head.
419 - Used to denote anything corrupt, fake or counterfeit. The origin of the term is that article 419 of the Nigerian Penal Code deals with offences associated with fraud and deceit. Of course, 419 is today an international term due to the Nigerian currency laundering scam e-mails received by most of us one time or the other
Blow grammar - To obfuscate, to confuse, to lie outright, to window-dress achievements. Usually used as an accusation to deter excessively flowery sweet-talk, delivered with a snort 'O ya, na too much grammar you dey blow.'
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Friday, August 26, 2005
Life Update
Just an update for those who are worried about me living in a hotel which is probably no-one:
I got my passport back with a new visa and a residence permit! This is really good news because if I didn't get it back, I wouldn't be able to fly home for the wedding!!!
I got our little vehicle. It is a Toyota Rav4 - green with a cd player. Not quite as nice as my Tacoma - but it is the first new vehicle that I have ever had - crazy.
I hired a driver and a stewardess / cook. The driver's name is Rotimi and he seems nice enough - he gets paid about 25,000 Naira per month plus overtime if we go out in the evenings. 25,000 Naira works out to about $175 US and from that he must support his wife and 3 children. The stewardess (she cleans/shops for groceries/laundry), her name is Josephine and she seems really sweet. She will be working part time for us and part time for another lady in our building. She is going to move into the quarters available for house help with her husband. She will get paid about 10,000 Naira per month or less than $75 US! We will also end up paying for transportation/health care/school for kids/bonuses etc for them because otherwise, they could not afford it! They both seem like very nice, trustworthy and kind people so, it will be great to have them and their families around.
Last thing to sort out will be the flat - which I will be working on today. It is nice and brand new - over looks Kuramo Waters, a small lagoon. Right now, I need to figure out how to get a stove put in and have the furniture set up before I leave for Canada! Patience is required!
RQ
I got my passport back with a new visa and a residence permit! This is really good news because if I didn't get it back, I wouldn't be able to fly home for the wedding!!!
I got our little vehicle. It is a Toyota Rav4 - green with a cd player. Not quite as nice as my Tacoma - but it is the first new vehicle that I have ever had - crazy.
I hired a driver and a stewardess / cook. The driver's name is Rotimi and he seems nice enough - he gets paid about 25,000 Naira per month plus overtime if we go out in the evenings. 25,000 Naira works out to about $175 US and from that he must support his wife and 3 children. The stewardess (she cleans/shops for groceries/laundry), her name is Josephine and she seems really sweet. She will be working part time for us and part time for another lady in our building. She is going to move into the quarters available for house help with her husband. She will get paid about 10,000 Naira per month or less than $75 US! We will also end up paying for transportation/health care/school for kids/bonuses etc for them because otherwise, they could not afford it! They both seem like very nice, trustworthy and kind people so, it will be great to have them and their families around.
Last thing to sort out will be the flat - which I will be working on today. It is nice and brand new - over looks Kuramo Waters, a small lagoon. Right now, I need to figure out how to get a stove put in and have the furniture set up before I leave for Canada! Patience is required!
RQ
Lagos Yacht Club
So, last weekend I was invited to go crew on a small sail boat in Lagos Harbour. The boats are 3 person, 18', "lightning." This Yacht club has only 2 classes which sail - these sailboats and they have a bunch of Hoby Cats also. So, I got invited out on 'Race Day' and this particular day, we had 2 races about 90mins each.
A bit of background: I don't have a clue how to sail. I have been in a boat before and I have even sailed a boat by myself, but I never really knew what I was doing. So, I was #3 in the boat which means that I didn't have to work the sails or rudder - I just shifted my weight back and forth to keep the boat flat in the water. The wind was quite strong this particular day, making tacking quite fun as the boat moves quickly and you get to hang off the side of the boat to try to keep it from tipping over.
The race course is around about 5 buoys which are all over the Lagos harbour. Of course as this is an active harbour, there are ships moving in and out of the harbour. Most are small fishing trawlers and such but there were a couple LARGE container ships and fuel tankers moving about. At one point in the first race, a very scary thing happened where a 100' trawler drove over one of the sail boats! The crew of the sail boat jumped out of the boat before getting hit... and the Yacht Club rescue boats raced over to pull them from the water! Pretty scary to watch, so none the less we avoided the ships for the rest of the race!
The great thing about it was while we were sailing down wind and there is not much work to do - you really forget about all the hussle - bussle that is going on just a few hundred meters away.
So, we made a few mistakes while sailing - jib lines tangled up and 1 poor Gybe (my fault) which resulted in us placing ~5th or 6th in both races - but at least we finished and had a good time. Unfortunately for my career, the skipper was the Executive Director for Mobil here in Nigeria... so, I had better get back to work to make up for it!
Cheers, RQ
Monday, August 22, 2005
Why no updates?
Sorry again for the lack of updates last week - I will try to keep updating you all with what is going on... But, if you have questions - let me know, it helps me think of things to write about! I also have been taking pictures, but until I get a proper work computer sorted out, they'll have to wait.
So, Shirley Ritchie sent a note and asked:
I love your blog, but where are the updates?? Thanks and Sorry, Sorry - I'll keep it up!
Are you working in an office or are you travelling around? I am working in an office in Lagos, but all the work that I do is for an offshore platform South of Port Harcourt. In the future, I will be travelling to the platform to help out and learn. The reason that I can't go now is that I had to send my passport and visa to Abjula (capital of Nigeria) to get my residency and work permit sorted out. These are required to go and work offshore (they are also required to leave the country - so I hope that they get finished before I leave for Canada!)
What is the compound like that you are living in? So, my housing status is a bit screwy right now... I am currently living in a hotel. It is a very nice hotel (even by western standards), but it still is a hotel. The problem is that our flat in the housing compound (really it is a high rise apartment with a big fence and gate around it) isn't quite ready for us yet. It is a brand new building - right on a lagoon called Kuramo Waters. The building is gorgeous - has a nice pool, pool deck with outdoor bar, pool and foosball tables, indoor bar area and a gym. We were there for a great party on Saturday where one of the guys had a "turkey fry." They put the whole turkey into a pot of boiling peanut oil and fry it for 40mins - awesome Southern cusine! But, our flat is 2 bedrooms, a big living room, kitchen, 2.5 bath and 2 balconys. It has quarters for hired help and a separate entrance for the steward or cook. The building is only 14 flats - so not too big and all the people there are people that I work with. In addition to this building there are 3 others that expats from our company stay at. All told there are about 75 famlies here working for Esso.
Do you find it expensive there? Yea - most things are expensive - especially in the stores which cater to western shoppers because all that stuff is imported from Europe. But, that being said, you can buy pretty much anything here! During a "go-slow" or traffic jam, there are vendors selling everything from woven baskets to CD-Roms to watches to spices. If you need it someone on the street has it! I went to the new movie theater last night - it was just like home... except no Dolby Surround Sound. They just turn up the volume really loud to compensate. So, it cost 1,500 Naira (143 Naira / $1USD) so it is about the same as a movie back home. Eating out has been expensive - it was ~1,800 Naira for a sandwich or burger and fries - about $15Can. But, if you go to the markets and eat in the same places as the locals - it will be much cheaper (but you might run out of immodium!)
Are you eating different foods? Yea, tons of interesting food - though none of it has been Nigerian! I think it has to do with the fact that Nigeria was a British colony so they never got the influences of exciting foods. Most Nigerian food is rice, cabbage or yams, meat on a plate. But, there are tons of 2 generation Lebanese here so there are several good Lebanese restaraunts. There are also Thai, Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Italian and Tex-Mex places - most of them run by people from those countries.
Have you had any exciting discoveries? Not really - I mean other than the disgusting/dissapointing ones... it will take some time to see the rewarding things I suspect. Outside my office window (which faces 5 cowrie creek) I can see "shit rock" that is where the street vendors go to poop beside the river. Then 10m downstream is a lady washing her clothes, while some fishermen pull in some shrimp or crab! Yuk. The garbage is bad in the water - sometimes worse than others. Umm - exciting... well I was surprized by how poor the english that is spoken here is. I was told that it was an English speaking country - not really, they speak pigeon english which is a mix of Yourba and English, which is really difficult for untrained ears to understand. The traffic is exciting - kinda like a slow speed rollercoaster. Honking and weaving - the motorbikes (called Okadas - after a failed Nigerian Airline which was known for its poorly maintained airplanes) weave in and out of car traffic - often the wrong way. You have to look both ways really well before crossing the road because even if the cars are stopped - an Okada might be zipping down the stopped cars the wrong way!
Are you working crazy hours with no free time or do you have time to explore? My hours of work haven't been too bad yet - but they are quickly loading me up. Typically I work 7-5, 5 days a week and a half day on Saturday. We get a chance to go out and about in the evenings - but for the most part we have stuck to the "easy" places like movies, pubs, British High Commission (great English beers and super fish and chips!). I am a bit limited right now because I don't yet have my own vehicle - so I am stuck bumming a ride from other expats and public transport (taxis - no busses here!) is unsafe.
Is it safe to explore? Yea for the most part is is okay - the company has said that there are some areas that we are not supposed to walk / drive around on our own. But, all in all, that is the same in every large city in the world. There are lots of places in NYC that I wouldn't feel comfortable walking around by myself. Lagos and Port Harcourt are the worst - the rest of the country is for the most part very safe to travel around and explore.
OKAY - just send a note if you all have some questions! I'll send more soon - I have some sailing stories to tell...
So, Shirley Ritchie sent a note and asked:
I love your blog, but where are the updates?? Thanks and Sorry, Sorry - I'll keep it up!
Are you working in an office or are you travelling around? I am working in an office in Lagos, but all the work that I do is for an offshore platform South of Port Harcourt. In the future, I will be travelling to the platform to help out and learn. The reason that I can't go now is that I had to send my passport and visa to Abjula (capital of Nigeria) to get my residency and work permit sorted out. These are required to go and work offshore (they are also required to leave the country - so I hope that they get finished before I leave for Canada!)
What is the compound like that you are living in? So, my housing status is a bit screwy right now... I am currently living in a hotel. It is a very nice hotel (even by western standards), but it still is a hotel. The problem is that our flat in the housing compound (really it is a high rise apartment with a big fence and gate around it) isn't quite ready for us yet. It is a brand new building - right on a lagoon called Kuramo Waters. The building is gorgeous - has a nice pool, pool deck with outdoor bar, pool and foosball tables, indoor bar area and a gym. We were there for a great party on Saturday where one of the guys had a "turkey fry." They put the whole turkey into a pot of boiling peanut oil and fry it for 40mins - awesome Southern cusine! But, our flat is 2 bedrooms, a big living room, kitchen, 2.5 bath and 2 balconys. It has quarters for hired help and a separate entrance for the steward or cook. The building is only 14 flats - so not too big and all the people there are people that I work with. In addition to this building there are 3 others that expats from our company stay at. All told there are about 75 famlies here working for Esso.
Do you find it expensive there? Yea - most things are expensive - especially in the stores which cater to western shoppers because all that stuff is imported from Europe. But, that being said, you can buy pretty much anything here! During a "go-slow" or traffic jam, there are vendors selling everything from woven baskets to CD-Roms to watches to spices. If you need it someone on the street has it! I went to the new movie theater last night - it was just like home... except no Dolby Surround Sound. They just turn up the volume really loud to compensate. So, it cost 1,500 Naira (143 Naira / $1USD) so it is about the same as a movie back home. Eating out has been expensive - it was ~1,800 Naira for a sandwich or burger and fries - about $15Can. But, if you go to the markets and eat in the same places as the locals - it will be much cheaper (but you might run out of immodium!)
Are you eating different foods? Yea, tons of interesting food - though none of it has been Nigerian! I think it has to do with the fact that Nigeria was a British colony so they never got the influences of exciting foods. Most Nigerian food is rice, cabbage or yams, meat on a plate. But, there are tons of 2 generation Lebanese here so there are several good Lebanese restaraunts. There are also Thai, Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Italian and Tex-Mex places - most of them run by people from those countries.
Have you had any exciting discoveries? Not really - I mean other than the disgusting/dissapointing ones... it will take some time to see the rewarding things I suspect. Outside my office window (which faces 5 cowrie creek) I can see "shit rock" that is where the street vendors go to poop beside the river. Then 10m downstream is a lady washing her clothes, while some fishermen pull in some shrimp or crab! Yuk. The garbage is bad in the water - sometimes worse than others. Umm - exciting... well I was surprized by how poor the english that is spoken here is. I was told that it was an English speaking country - not really, they speak pigeon english which is a mix of Yourba and English, which is really difficult for untrained ears to understand. The traffic is exciting - kinda like a slow speed rollercoaster. Honking and weaving - the motorbikes (called Okadas - after a failed Nigerian Airline which was known for its poorly maintained airplanes) weave in and out of car traffic - often the wrong way. You have to look both ways really well before crossing the road because even if the cars are stopped - an Okada might be zipping down the stopped cars the wrong way!
Are you working crazy hours with no free time or do you have time to explore? My hours of work haven't been too bad yet - but they are quickly loading me up. Typically I work 7-5, 5 days a week and a half day on Saturday. We get a chance to go out and about in the evenings - but for the most part we have stuck to the "easy" places like movies, pubs, British High Commission (great English beers and super fish and chips!). I am a bit limited right now because I don't yet have my own vehicle - so I am stuck bumming a ride from other expats and public transport (taxis - no busses here!) is unsafe.
Is it safe to explore? Yea for the most part is is okay - the company has said that there are some areas that we are not supposed to walk / drive around on our own. But, all in all, that is the same in every large city in the world. There are lots of places in NYC that I wouldn't feel comfortable walking around by myself. Lagos and Port Harcourt are the worst - the rest of the country is for the most part very safe to travel around and explore.
OKAY - just send a note if you all have some questions! I'll send more soon - I have some sailing stories to tell...
Friday, August 19, 2005
International Dining in Lagos?
Sorry that I have taken so long to update with another post. Compared to all the excitement that I had getting here - the last week or so seem so bland. But, in actual fact, there are lots of cool things going on here:
So, I am currently staying in a nice hotel here in Lagos - it is right on the ocean and an enjoyable evening is spent at the outdoor restaurant, by the pool with the breeze off the ocean. The problem with living in a hotel for weeks on end is that you quickly tire of the food at the hotel - so I have had the opportunity to eat Tex-Mex, Thai, Indian, Lebanese, Chinese, Japanese, Italian and even authentic British Fish and Chips! It is actually really neat that there are so many cultures here and all of them have opened up different restaurants to cater both to the expats and the adventurous locals.
On the weekends, the Mobil expats usually have a BBQ at one of the housing blocks and everyone gets together and drinks wine and eats too much food. It is a very close net community and they really look out for one another, which is really nice! The female employees and the wives of other expats are all excited to have Desiree over - I'm sure they will be a great help.
So, Mondays there is a "Hash" where people run around town chasing a "rabbit" and drink beer - they call themselves a drinking club with a running problem. Tuesdays is V-Ball at the British High Commission, Wednesday is "International" night again at the BHC and they serve great fish and chips. On Saturday, they run races in three person "Lightning" sail boats out of the Yacht Club and Sunday has a cruise up to the Mobil beach hut again in the sail boats. It seems like there is something going on almost everyday!
Well - I am starting to settle in (as best as you can when you live in a hotel) and am looking forward to coming home and seeing Desi and all our friends. I have my flight booked back to Calgary on the 8th of Sept! I'll give the update on my housing and vehicle in the next post!
RQ
So, I am currently staying in a nice hotel here in Lagos - it is right on the ocean and an enjoyable evening is spent at the outdoor restaurant, by the pool with the breeze off the ocean. The problem with living in a hotel for weeks on end is that you quickly tire of the food at the hotel - so I have had the opportunity to eat Tex-Mex, Thai, Indian, Lebanese, Chinese, Japanese, Italian and even authentic British Fish and Chips! It is actually really neat that there are so many cultures here and all of them have opened up different restaurants to cater both to the expats and the adventurous locals.
On the weekends, the Mobil expats usually have a BBQ at one of the housing blocks and everyone gets together and drinks wine and eats too much food. It is a very close net community and they really look out for one another, which is really nice! The female employees and the wives of other expats are all excited to have Desiree over - I'm sure they will be a great help.
So, Mondays there is a "Hash" where people run around town chasing a "rabbit" and drink beer - they call themselves a drinking club with a running problem. Tuesdays is V-Ball at the British High Commission, Wednesday is "International" night again at the BHC and they serve great fish and chips. On Saturday, they run races in three person "Lightning" sail boats out of the Yacht Club and Sunday has a cruise up to the Mobil beach hut again in the sail boats. It seems like there is something going on almost everyday!
Well - I am starting to settle in (as best as you can when you live in a hotel) and am looking forward to coming home and seeing Desi and all our friends. I have my flight booked back to Calgary on the 8th of Sept! I'll give the update on my housing and vehicle in the next post!
RQ
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